These next performers are in their own category because they rank as the ones I talked about the most all year.  I can gauge how much I like I something by surveying my external monologue.  When I have recounted in overly-excited detail someone's act more than ten different times to performers, fans, friends and strangers...then I realize that I've been really moved.  These are the 3 artists I talked and thought about the most in 2010. 

-T.L.

SURLIE TEMPLE Denver, CO

Surlie Temple performed a quite literal interpretation of Weezer’s “Sweater Song” during the Colorado Burlesque Festival that had me torn between complete hysteria and stunned silence.   Looking like a Gen-X fiber arts major, Surlie took the stage attired in an crocheted knee-length dress, matching stocking cap and leg warmers.  When the song began, it was plain to see where this scenario was headed.  She’s going to unravel a sweater.  BUT THIS? A hand-made crocheted art project that probably took 3 hours to reset each time it was performed?  Make no mistake...I am no fan of literally interpreting songs in burlesque, but this was SO literal and so well executed, it is worth recounting in more detail.  Ms. Temple began pulling at a single thread slowly.  Bright yarn pulled out faster and faster, revealing that the dress was pieced from crocheted strips that she had stitched together.  As I screamed “YAAAARRRRN ARRRTTT!!!” over and over again with my arms raised above my head, Surlie took a break form the dress and paused to unravel a gorgeous leg warmer that would probably have cost $200 at Anthropology, but she had obviously made them herself.  Genius.  As the final chorus built.... “lying on the floor, I’ve come undone...”  the sweater dress deconstructed into a pile around her feet that literally and figuratively immobilized her.  At this point, the act had completely transformed in something timeless. The sight of Surlie’s yarn (of course) pom-pom pasties was nice, but her performance had a transcendent quality.  This journey had begun as a disaffected yet stylish battle between hurt, revenge and sacrifice...  A sacrifice of not just an incredible craft project, but of something more elusive: time and love.  I found out later her mother was in the audience that night.  Her mother who taught her how to crochet....and, it turns out, she wasn’t a fibers major in art school after all.  Epic.

MICHELLE L'AMOUR'S "PANTHER" ACT

It seems so obvious to celebrate Michelle L'Amour.  She continually puts on the most professional burlesque shows, seamlessly stars in them, tops even herself artistically year after year and runs a huge talented burlesque empire in a major American city.  SO FUCKING WHAT, MICHELLE....WE ALL WORK HARD! So what, indeed. But really, let's break it down.  She's a major pioneer in the world of burlesque and tirelessly titillates huge audiences on the largest stages in the country.  And this year she turned out her best work yet with her "Panther Act."  The act is smart, smoldering art house sex brought to life.  Set to Artie Shaw's ominous "Nightmare" Michelle slinks around with a dark and dirty edge that makes the act completely mesmerizing.  The performance is innovative not only for it's thorough use of a giant cage (girls take note on how to work a prop!), or for Michelle's minimalist costume that included shoulder garters for her gloves and paw shaped merkin, but REALLY it's innovative because it's completely modern.  Not a hint of camp anywhere.  She fucking means business.  This act gets my highest praise because Michelle is a woman who can present the filthiest stripper moves like they are high art and you feel smart for being so turned on.

And last but not least, there was one artistic achievement that stood out the most for me this year. One that deserves the overall top prize this blog can offer...

 THE 2010 BIG ARTISTS OF THE YEAR...

THE STAGE DOOR JOHNNIES

If I heard myself ask one more person in NY this fall, "Have you seen the Johnnies yet?"  I think I was going to poke my own eyes out.  I've fallen hard and fast for them.  The love affair began in June in Vegas at BHOF when Jett Adore swished his cape around my heart during his Zorro number that had me wondering why the hell that perfectly choreographed, dashingly flirtatious and hilariously executed act didn't make it into the competition.  I proceeded to quietly stalk him all weekend and take pictures of him whether he was looking in my direction or not.  I had met the Johnnies before, but seeing them on their own was like meeting a hot guy who is friends with two other hot guys...oh, crap! Even my ability to make analogies is immobilized with them! Anyway, then in August I got see all the Johnnies together on their home turf: at their weekly boylesque show in Chicago.  Ray Gunn, Jett Adore and Bazuka Joe.  Jaw-on-floor.  They did it all: they danced solo, they danced together, they were serious, they were funny, they had great costumes, they looked great naked, they flipped out of their pants, they teased constantly and totally tormented the audience until I found myself screaming my head off to see their junk. 

I got to spend more time with them in September in NYC during Tigger's Man-A-Tease show at Coney Island, and exchanged fascinating emails while researching the Boylesque article for this blog in October.  And that's when the deal was sealed.  They have so much physical talent, such clever ideas, execute them so well and are so incredibly pleasing to the eye, they truly are BIG Artists. They have raised the bar for all of us and I hope they continue to astound us for a long time! 

CONGRATS, JOHNNIES!!  You win...uhhh....you win a lot of love, CAPITAL LETTERS and bragging rights, woo hoo!

Enjoy them together:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R95IYxmHzTY

Enjoy them separately:  Ray Gunn,  Bazuka Joe and Jett Adore

BROWN GIRLS BURLESQUE:  COSTUMING  Costumes that are simple, inspired and surprising all at once!  Imagine a cotton, plaid, ruffly, peasant-meets-showgirl look with top hats...with a multi-cultural can can that gave way to a group corset unlacing extravaganza.  Each girl undoing the laces of the girl in front, creating a sexy daisy chain of strings and burgeoning nudity.  Revealing international flags and appearing to be having the most fun ever, it all culminated with each of them perched on a nest of discarded ruffle skirts wildly swinging their bras over the heads.  The U.N. should really consider hiring these girls to promote world peace.

MADAME ROSEBUD:  RISK TAKING  This is some of the ballsiest burlesque we've ever seen. Rosebud created a compelling and fucked up character through grotesque exaggeration.  Super hard core, she danced to Grace Jones' song "Corporate Canibal" and managed to take even Grace Jones to the next level. It's hard to even describe all of the crazy things that happened but we'll try...there was a "Phantom of the Opera"-type mask pulled away to reveal an entire lace face stocking that then pulled off to reveal a genuine flaming red mohawk.  There were splits, giant jumps to landing on knees and the dirtiest butterfly leg moves ever seen.  Rosebud was dirty, aggressive and raw and walked the line between sexy and obscene.  Thanks Rosebud, for the amazing reveals and wild physicality, all delivered with precision and polish.

LEROI THE GIRL:  ENERGY  Leroi is literally a one woman parade....and this time the holiday she's celebrating is Chinese New Year.  Entering the stage jumping up and down with a giant Chinese dragon head piece, Leroi maintained a ridiculously high level of energy from start to finish. Rampaging playfully in the crowd's face and showing her claws, she was a sexy playful dragon bouncing with exhuberance.  This woman is a living confetti canon!

KARL GIANT:  TRANSORMATION Make-up artist and photographer, Karl Giant, graced the festival with his presence this year to sell his over-the-top eyelashes, but also found time on Saturday to transform his longtime collaborator, Julie Atlas Muz, into some sort of glamorous Russian go-go dancer posing as Alice Cooper.   But visual spectacle was only a tip of the iceberg.  The real fun was watching Julie onstage as she put the power behind the style.  With a captivating punk fusion of sex and dancing that included whiplashing her pony tail around her head, dive rolling out of her underwear, ripping off her pasties and parading around like Naomi Campbell wearing trashbags. Even still the icing on the cake may have been the song itself, which gave voice to this hilarious monstrosity by repeating over and over in the lyrics: “Fuck you.”  Thanks to Karl for helping give birth to Julie's latest incarnation.

SHOUT OUTS TO MY OTHER FAVES OF THE NYBF:
Cherry Pitz for incredible acting while staging a scene with Vincent Price.  Boo Boo Darlin's slow motion striptease to hip hop was hilarious.  Dr. Lucky gets props for putting the ass in class while appearing as Marie Antoinette on her "golden throne."  Cherry Typhoon delights every time with her exuberance.  And Miss Tickle's genius transformation from a blow up doll.

A few discernible trends emerged from the BHOF weekend as a whole:

*Canada is clearly taking over.  The great, white north SERIOUSLY represented this year in both quantity and quality.  Watch out, world!

*This was the year of the giant prop!  Our collective imaginations went for scale in a big way this year and the results were outrageous:  crystal covered toilets, a coffin, candy apple, a bull, smoking cigar, several cages, a swing, a couple of shadow screens, half a dozen couches, and a cake with taxidermy mounted on it (that one’s mine).

 *We were reminded of the fragility of our living legends. Tempest Storm was injured after an on-stage spill at the Friday night Legends show, but thankfully she has already had hip surgery and is in physical therapy.  Everyone is hoping she's back in her heels as fast as possible!

I took notes diligently during the four nights of shows (100 performances) and was very inspired!  When forced to look purely at the criteria of "innovation" and ask the hard question: "have I ever seen this before?"- seven artists emerged as BIG Winners.  Fittingly, several of them were also winners at the BHOF.  Listed below in no particular order. 

INTRODUCING THE BIG WINNERS from BHOF 2010

Venus DeMille: Minnie the Moocher for COSTUME Hands down, Venus created the most innovative costume of the entire weekend. Emerging from a gorgeous gown to become Minnie Mouse, I was laughing and screaming through every moment: a mile-long glove removal, giant white cartoon hands rubbing all over her body and mouse ears made from the cups of her bra. All of this brilliance was set to the Cab Calloway "Minnie the Moocher" standard that Venus has now ruined for me for all time.

Betsy Bottom Dollar for MOVEMENT She was the closing act for Thursday night and nearly stole the show for me. This Cheesecake Burlesque darling looked like she could be the Tennessee sister of both Dirty Martini and Darlinda Just Darlinda. She performed to an over-the-top banjo heavy western piece of music that was brilliantly animated by just about every single part of her body and costume which reached thrilling proportions during her ass solo. I have never seen country music used to such hilarious, fun and stylish ends in burlesque before.

Julie Atlas Muz’ “Waiting for the Sun”: RISK TAKING Entering in the biggest headdress of the weekend, Julie’s major innovation was her hilariously entertaining slide across the stage on sunburst knee pads. Perhaps this was an athletic and playful fulfillment of some childhood fantasy, but she still looked hot as hell doing something totally ridiculous. One of Julie’s considerable gifts is her ability to take risks- both physically and conceptually. There certainly isn’t enough balls-out risk-taking in my book. Once finished her floor work, Julie ran into the audience, face-humped Java and concluded by downing a martini which she shot fountain-like out of her mouth above him. This woman is always full of surprises and wherever her creativity takes us, I always want to go.

Ms. Tickle’s Fan Dance: COSTUME Tickle clearly doesn’t need more acknowledgment since she took home a record THREE trophies including Best Debut, but considering how long she has been a creative force in the NYC scene, she deserves every bit of praise. When Tickle emerged with a full six white fans affixed to her arms as wings framing her porcelain figure, she gave us an unforgettable moment of beauty embodied that will be burned into our psyches. As Miss Astrid said “sometimes is takes 12 years to become an over night sensation.” Ms. Tickle totally proves you can be innovative and classic at the same time.

Midnight Martini: SINGLE MOST INNOVATIVE MOVE A fun and flexible contortionist who’s thoughtful act was brilliantly over shadowed by her historical achievement: Giving us the best stocking removal of all time.

Kristina Nekiya’s “Suspiria” Act: for REVEAL Kristina is an accomplished bellydancer and contortionist who shocked me with this dark tribute to a cult horror movie I’ve never seen before. But who cares? Seeing Kristina start the act by emerging zombie-like out of an ornate coffin and ending with a full skeleton rendered in glowing paint all over her limber body (complete with red glowing eyes and glowing hair), her final reveal in black light was disturbingly enthralling.

The Evil Hate Monkey: “Prima Primate”: MOVEMENT It’s true that I am completely biased, but I consider Monkey to be one of the most entertaining performers out there. He continues to amaze even me after 9 years of working together and I’d be remiss to over look his revolutionary use of pointe in burlesque. Not only did he demonstrate an impressive degree of mastery of a painful feminine form of ballet, he invented moves never seen before! These moves included a monkey-like squat hop where he repeatedly bounced up and down on his pointe shoes while in a deep squat that would make any athlete’s legs tremble...all while ape-ishly dancing with his arms. He also managed to pop straight up to pointe from sitting on the ground. Props, Monkey.

I first had the idea of BIG in 2009 because of these weird and wonderful performances.  Although I have decided not to go backwards in time with this Blog, but rather only document what is happening at present- since these artists were the inspiration, I am grandmothering them in as winners for 2009.

NARCISSISTER for "Hot Lunch"  For shear provacation, Narcissister is up there with Rose Wood...so it is fitting that I have worked with both of them the most at the infamous Box in NYC. As an Alvin Ailey trained dancer, Narcisster moves like a lithe panther you want to pounce on, but the visual imagery she conjures surreally contrasts the many stereotypes she targets.

CRISPIN GLOVER for film "Everything is Fine"  Crispin Glover is the new Russ Meyer. And while this really is not burlesque-y in the slightest, I have to acknowledge game-changing inspiration when I see it. The actor-turned-director will only allow the second of his secretive trilogy to be screened by him personally, so it may be hard for most to even experience his genius. But this film changed my life. It was disturbing, hilarious, surreal, inspiring, scary and warped in the best ways possible. It is basically a wish-fulfillment fantasy of a man Cerebal Palsy having sex with and exacting revenge upon beautiful women.

MISS ASTRID for the nuptuals of Michelle L'Amour & Franky Vivid Weddings will never be the same. Astrid donned a veil over her eye patch, told the groom to fuck off, warned him that Michelle's "ass that goes POW" will one day be the "ass that goes Phft" and stole the show at the Burlesque Hall of Fame Friday night show.

TAYLOR MAC & THE CAST for "Lily's Revenge" Don't know where to start describing this one...but veteran burlesquers Tigger and Darlinda Just Darlinda were real standouts in this epic 5-hour theater piece.